Ongoing personal project on LGBTQ, sexuality, and gender.

Sexual orientations and gender choices outside of mainstream choices are, unfortunately, often seen as perversions. Or worse, they are ignored, disregarded and muted altogether.

Why do we have to put sexual orientations and genders into little boxes? There are so many different ways of love and living except from "male" and "female", "straight" or "gay".

It's okay not to agree or accept other people's ways of living, but it would be great to understand and respect their choices too.

"People are afraid of things they are not familiar with."

When I met Henrika, her landlord told her she couldn't move into the flat that she already signed a contract for, two days before her move in date, and also threatened to confiscate her deposit.

There is practically nothing she can do about it because the flat is "girls only". Henrika is a pre-op transgender female, and is not legally female.

In Hong Kong (and most other places too), she needs to have consultation sessions and hormone therapy for around two years in order to proceed to a full sex change operation. During these two years, despite the changes that will have already occured in her mind and body, she is still, technically and legally, male.

Whilst the debate and discussions continue on legislations and definitions of gender, searching for a flat is not the most difficult thing that Henrika and more people in her shoes have to face.

"If someone can brainwash me to make me feel comfortable as a man, why not? Transition, even in a supportive environment, is tough as fuck. I do it only because there is no way to brainwash me."


I met Blue through Henrika, talking about "Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind" over beer.

Blue spent even more time thereafter explaining their sexuality and gender to me, because it was a slightly new concept to me.

There are males, and there are females. Blue is agender and non-binary. They do not identify with neither of these and do not feel like they have a gender. Its different from transgender or crossdressers; the way I understand it, trans is like freeing a lion's soul trapped inside a tiger's body; crossdressing is a lion dressing up as a tiger, where agender is just being a leopard.

Some days Blue will be fine with their femininity, some days less so. I guess its like sleeping with your hair wet, and you never know what you get until the next morning. With hair, you can always get a new blowout if you had a bad hairday. For Blue, its trying to cope with a lion's physique being a leopard, and at the same time convincing the world that everything is okay.

It took us hundreds of years to understand that there is more to a person than the colour of their skin. Hopefully it takes less for us to understand that grammar might be able to bound linguistic grammar, it is not something that can or should bound a human's being.
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